Sunday, May 9, 2010

Mother's Day Thoughts

Happy Mother's Day to all who wish to be wished such.

Mother's Day is a tricky business. The trickiness of it is well layed-out here. Obviously, I'm a mother, so the non-mother trickiness isn't so much of an issue for me. But the pedestal building ideal mother talks we typically have to suffer through is. And, with a smattering of Mother's Day posts running through the Bloggernacle over the past month or so, I've been thinking about what I really want or don't want out of Mother's Day.

I can't say I've nailed anything down definitively, but I've come to a few conclusions. One of my concerns with Mother's Day is that is seems to make it easy for people to cram all their "appreciation" into one day and then forget about it for the rest of the year. And then there's the idea that, really, Mother's Day can easily become women running around appreciating women rather than letting the kids or men take care of it. It's also a day that can easily build up expectations about how others will possibly show their appreciation, only to leave you disappointed and discouraged that, really, this day was no different than any other, with no one helping out or even acknowledging all the work you've done.

What would I like in a Mother's Day? Well, church-wise, I'd love the talks to simply center on Christ. Or substantive talks about women in the scriptures - maybe about some of the women prophets. And, personally, I'd like to see the money the ward spends on the women going to a local charity or organization that helps women in some way. A shelter or a group that provides a scholarship for women for schooling. Something along those lines. Basically, show me that you care about improving conditions for women rather than just talking about how important we are.

In my own home, I've realized that maybe I'm a bit high-maintenance. :) Rather than having one day where I'm treated lavishly and don't have to do anything, I much prefer appreciation shown randomly throughout the year. It means a lot more to me to come home from book group and find the dishes done and the kitchen cleaned. Or to come home and find all the laundry folded or the bathroom cleaned another night. Or to occasionally be given a few hours or a day free of Gareth, to spend however I want. Because that means that someone was thinking about what I might need or enjoy - what might make my day a little brighter - not because they have to due to a holiday, but because I truly am important to them.

1 comment:

MarySquare said...

I am sympathetic to the idea that I don't want women doing all the work to make Mother's Day successful at church, but... don't women have mothers? As women, shouldn't we be just as appreciative and demonstrative of mothers on Mother's Day as the men? All humans have mothers, so at my ideal Mother's Day Sunday, the men and women would work together to celebrate the mothers.